It happened again this weekend. I was recognized by a complete stranger, not for who I am, but for who my parents are.
For most of my life I have been irritated by this situation. I felt like people didn't know who I was, they just assumed they knew me because they knew my parents. I wasn't seen as me but as my parents' daughter. If my face wasn't recognized, my last name would be. For many years I would introduce myself just by my first name and only say my last name if someone specifically asked. (I still find myself doing that but now I think it's because Beth is easier to remember than Warkentin.)
I used to think this recognition thing would only happen in my hometown where my parents are well known. Boy was I wrong.
About 15 years ago, I was sitting in the airport terminal waiting for my flight out of LAX to Fresno when a couple, who looked about my parents' age, approached me and said those fateful words, "Excuse us but are you Don and Janet's daughter?"
"Uh, yes..." I said very hesitantly, "Who are you?"
"Oh we're (names?). We went to high school with your parents! We knew they got married. We didn't know if they had kids or how old you would be but you look just like them so we were sure you were their daughter!" said the wife. I was too shocked to even hear their names.
"Really?!?! You could tell that from all the way across the terminal?!" I exclaimed.
"Well, ya. We were pretty sure but we looked at the passenger list to double check. He's a pilot," she explained, pointing to her husband, "so he went over to the desk at the gate and glanced at the list. We saw you're last name and then we knew for sure!"
I was stunned. Absolutely stunned that two strangers, who didn't even know I had been born, could spot me from across a crowded airport and identify me as my parents' daughter. Incredible. I knew then that there was no denying it, I look just like them. I may as well embrace it.
In January I cut 8 inches off my hair and for the first time since infancy my hair was shorter than my mom's. Right after I got my hair cut, I went to my parents' house and was sitting across the table from my dad when he suddenly looked up from the newspaper and said, "You're beautiful." This statement immediately made me suspicious because all my life he has made it a point to compliment my character instead of my appearance. Then it hit me. I squinted my eyes, tilted my head, and said accusingly, "I look just like mom, don't I?" Yep. Spitting image. I could feel it. I wasn't upset though. I just laughed and smiled.
I've been recognized by strangers many times since that day in the airport and each time I'm surprised by it. But each time I'm able to embrace it a little more and understand a little more deeply than it's a gift to have such an amazing heritage. I'm happy to be a Warkentin and am proud to be known as Don and Janet's daughter.
Wow. I must be growing up. ;)
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